It’s been here for so long
I think it’s safe now
To slowly let it go


Too many memories
Attached to one feeling
Don’t you understand?
I notice everything


 I fantasize the end
For too many times
I sometimes think
It’s already done


There was a loud sound
An instant pain
I saw it happen
But they held it back again


If it isn’t true
Why does it remain?


I walk past it all
So far and so bravely
Only to see that
I never left my place


It’s disappointing
To think you’ve succeeded
When you’ve only
Gone further back
To where it all began

I Belong in Another World


I belong in another world
Born at the wrong time
At the wrong place
On an alien planet
Called Earth

I try to witness
The millions of stars
From here down below
But all beauty is corrupted
And had there been
Any still untouched
I could not feel a connection

Every kindness around me
Every cruelty I endure
There should be emotions
But I feel none

This isn’t the planet
I call home
Green turned grey
Joy turned empty
Heart turned stone
The endless monotone scenery
Nothing spared from greed
Whatever love there may have been
All long gone now

I never got the chance
To feel

I want to leave this place
But where can I go?
No planet in the entire universe
Could fulfil my dreams
Of belonging




I knew it was time
The destination was within sight
But I couldn’t arrive

It ties me down
To a constant state
of despair and rage
Memories eclipsed any joy
I could have felt

I let it destroy myself
Yet reconstruct
the lives of others
For an irreparable past

Frustration, satisfaction
Desire, disgust
Unable to be discerned

Alex Rigaut


Trapped in the idea of their childhood
And lost in the ambitions of their former self
They dream of becoming an intellectual being

Existing purely for sciences
Unaware of the world outside
They believed in their own illusion too strongly
That slowly they ended up killing themselves
But it didn’t matter

They exalt death!
Just as others exalt life

It Is

He started crying and he didn’t understand why. He picked up a paintbrush, now a foreign companion, bringing back memories from so far away. Some things so past you shouldn’t feel anything when you recall them. But again, it always hurts. It hurts when you forget, it hurts when you remember. 3 years seemed like 90, and it echoes in his mind about what he could’ve been and what he couldn’t surpass. There is no respect and tolerance for failure. It takes just one mistake to lose everything. Every friend he ever knew and loved couldn’t understand. The paints scattered on the floor, a reminder of his responsibility. He touched them but he couldn’t feel. Whatever joy he once had in documenting his journey with these companions, it was all lost. He trembles at the thought that his future is fixed, that this is how it is and how it will be: a constant chagrin and endless despair. Strangers and friends are alike in ignorance. He lied to them all, but they never knew him so they thought he was the telling the truth. No one cared enough to ask and to accept. He stared at the empty canvas for hours on end, too afraid to begin, too afraid to do nothing. And every second to him is a lifetime of suffering. Can’t you hear, don’t you listen?

– 16 March 2017

Nova [A poem of an original character]

Above the ground
Of snow and silence
Overlooking the cities
A future peace
But still an enemy within

In this infinite universe
I could travel anywhere
Go against myself
I could be free
Though I may be
Out there alone

I drift away aimlessly
Into a space
Made of synthetic dreams
But somehow
It feels good to fall deeply
Into cosmic memories
Long forgotten

My happiness
Is somewhere
Beyond the stars
If I only knew